30 years together...

Me n my lover went back to JB for the weekend, twas my parents 30th anniversary so I forked out my life savings cuz my pay day was a week away n treated them alongside with the rest of our small clan to Hi-tea at Hyatt Regency…I did’nt know that Hi-teas in other states were cheap as compared to the ones in KL…of course the spread was not that much, but than again..if it were otherwise, as if lah terlarat nak choke on all of the food…

Nway, 30 years of marriage…I know some of u guys parents have made it thru more years..but just thk of the fragile state of marriages nowadays..what makes most marriage in the generations b4 work as compared to today’s marriage….

Back then there were no mobile, internet to stay in touch…if a couple were separated for a while…letters were the connecters…n yet they manage the conflicts..trust n shun from any source of betrayal… couples nowadays hav the freedom to meet n date on a regular basis..can hav dinners n curfew’s were a lot more flexible…I remember mom saying that she was only allowed out on her own after Form 6..that was like at the age of 18…n at what age r kids allowed out these days??..12, 13 maybe??..my grandfather was a very-very strict man..all his kids must be home to perform maghrib prayers together…no xcuse…

Parents nowadays just let the TV blare during maghrib…so there goes the amount of respect for prayer time…I believe we r living in a world of material, where entertainment, material possession,wealth & the social status is something that is upmost important…being successful is what most people crave for even if their family institute fails…

For us..owning a designer bag, driving a good car n being able to send our kids to the best day care or schools is an achievement..but wen I thk of it..my mum does not own even one premier designer bags…nor will she ever fork her money to do so..she still drives her 1999 Wira A/B which she bought cash…only has 2-3 paris of shoes..mainly black in color..she still has no collection of jewellary except for what she’s wearing..despite the fact that she made it to the top in her career eventhou not exactly to the no. 1 spot in RCJ… all her pay is for her..herself..no commitment... no bills to pay..lets compare that to her only daughter…has a number of bags..one or two designers, has better jewellary than her, drives a car that mom n dad put a nice deposit for, living in mums hse in KL, has numerous pairs of shoes, has endless credit card bills to pay..has to pay for petrol, study loan bla..bla..bla, expecting a baby in a few months time..n is nowhere near achieving career success …

Maybe if we lessen our aim on achieving material procession n social status we might be able to balance our family n career in hope that our relationship will last till the end…maybe if we pay more attention to God Almighty will we live peacefully n thgs will fall in the right places..maybe we might not even hav to fork our money for our kids education..what makes our kids different from those who can make it into National Uni…n does having a degree abroad make them more of a better person than us? Do all of them hav a happy life? Look around n u’ll find the answer…its’s not a sin to splurge if we can afford nice stuff for our family..but I belive to make it through years-years of marriage is to balance everything….it may be easier said than done..but if our parents can.why can’t we?..I hope n pray that my relationship will last till alam akhirat..insyallah..n all of my friends marriage/relationship will too…what we need to find is that BALANCE in life…so good luck to u guys n myself also..hopefully 30 years from now we will be with the same partner n living modestly but most importantly happily…